Tuesday, January 30, 2018

Parenting on a Monday ~ and Beyond! #2 in a Monday Series


BONUS: Monday's "List of Five" Mom Moments 
at the end of this post! 




~M.B.Varville-Rodriguez
 
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Today I though it was a perfect opportunity to share a question that came up in one of the groups I joined regarding regarding sensory concerns. 


 "Does anyone have a child who grinds
their teeth at night? What can you do? "

 
Copyright 2018 World of Writer Mom

 

World of Writer Mom Responded:

Copyright 2018 World of Writer Mom


I can tell when my daughter is stressed when she grinds her teeth at night. She's done this since she was a toddler and now is 15 years old. I encourage talking about feelings, discussing coping strategies, and offering other sensory experiences during the day. (According to age appropriate, understandable strategies.) A developmental pediatrician and dentist can be a great resource. If sensory issues are in play, then an Occupational Therapist who specializes in sensory integration can provide helpful alternatives that could help decrease the teeth grinding. Please let us know how things work out for you and what strategies end up being helpful. Best Wishes! There may be some items at this site to help with sensory concerns: 


 



 (Click on the link for "Biting" and check out the other calming strategies. Message me if you need info.)





Monday's "List of Five" Mom Moments




Just A Few Minutes of Peace

1. It is important for parents to take time for themselves.
It's not "selfish" but it is "self-filled."  




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 Create a Fun Meal and Memory with your children!


2. Parenting is can be so hard sometimes. It's easy to get lost in the fray of surviving day to day. Stop and take a few minutes to create a fun memory. It's when you and the kids are the most stressed that they (and you) need to do something silly and different. 

 
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 Lullaby and Good-Night, Parents


3.  Get some sleep. But not just any sleep. It's important to consider the quality of your evening slumber. A comfortable, supportive mattress, pillow, and bedding can make a world of difference.  For those evenings when the children climb into bed with you or for the rare moments when you can catch some solitary sleep, having a cozy nest to climb into is an incredible blessing!


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4. Discover what is near and dear to your heart. Find a way to promote your cause, start a fundraiser, or make a statement. We are parents who can make a difference in the world.  How will you chose to make your mark?
  


5.  Give yourself permission to let go of perfect parenting expectations. In an ideal world, we would all magically excel at breast feeding, never need special formulas for our children with sensitive stomachs, and blend our own home grown foods to create the best possible foods for our infants and toddlers.  If you are able to do these things even for a short time, that's wonderful! If you need some extra resources to round out your repertoire of stress management strategies, here's a couple of options:


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Sensitive Tummy Solutions






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They Grow Up Soooo Fast!

Copyright 2018 World of Writer Mom




Wishing everyone a wonderful week filled 
with challenges, adventures, &
plenty of resources to tackle your goals!

Kindest Regards,
~ Mary

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


https://www.facebook.com/writermomadvocate/









Monday, January 22, 2018

Parenting on a Monday ~ and Beyond!

BONUS: Monday's "List of Ten" Mom Moments at the end of this post! Today I thought it would be fun to share some helpful parenting products. Some of these products I knew about when I began having babies, and others are relatively new. So here are a few things that might make parenting a little less stressful. (How awesome to shop from home and have your products delivered!)


Nutritional Products
Supports Healthy Brain Development

Copyright 2017 World of Writer Mom



GERBER is a brand that is rich in family traditions. I remember Gerber in our home when I was growing up. As the oldest of six children, I became very familiar with the cereals, juices, formula, stages of jar food, and teething biscuits.  Even when we got older, I remember trying some of the foods when it came time to introduce them to a new sibling.  


One of my favorite flavors as a child (I would have eaten the entire jar of my brother's food) was called "Blueberry Buckle."  Now, Gerber has even more amazing flavors to select. Your infant, toddler, and preschooler will love the variety.  From new foods to nutritious snacks, you'll feel great about beginning your own GERBER traditions.



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Copyright 2017 World of Writer Mom


These moments go by so quickly. I'd love hear about your
 GERBER moments here! You may see your child
featured in one of my future blog posts when you share here!




 You deserve to be a Spoiled Mama!


http://shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=1120878&u=1690540&m=72067&urllink=&afftrack=



I wish I had known more about how to treat stretch marks when I was pregnant with my first child. (She's a teen now.)  This toxin-free and organic skin care Tummy Butter is silky smooth and nourishes your skin!  Prevent pregnancy stretch marks and treat yourself to this beautifully luxurious (yet affordable) moisturizer. 


Copyright 2017 World of Writer Mom


Excellent for use before, during, and after pregnancy! 
This would make a fabulous gift for
an expectant mother or a new mom.
 It's never too early to take care of your amazing skin!


Add captio<a target="_blank" href="http://shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=1018620&amp;u=1690540&amp;m=72067&amp;urllink=&amp;afftrack="><img src="http://static.shareasale.com/image/72067/Affiliate_Spoiled_Mama_750x750-1.jpg" border="0" alt="Organic pregnancy skincare" /></a>n


 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Monday's "List of Ten" Mom Moments


1.  I am learning to be content with the small successes and not
     get overwhelmed by all the things I still have to do.


2. Understanding that life is a process and nobody begins or ends 
    their time on earth with the stamp of perfection can be a relief.


3.  Having the self awareness to realize #2 can be the best gift you
     ever give to yourself!


4.  Remind yourself that each person has a different start point in
     terms of their spirituality. It is unfair and pointless to pass your
     judgment upon others in the name of religious righteousness


5.  I often remind my own children, "If it's not helpful, then don't 
     do/say it!"  I continuously remind myself to consider that same
     advice...especially when commenting on someone's site or other
     social media. There's a way to make your point without hurting
     someone.


6.  Be vigilant and aware of how stereotypes, labeling, and name-
     calling reduce the efficacy of your points.  There is a way you 
     can present a concern, dispute a claim, and state your case with
     dignity and respect for others and for yourself.


7.  One of the most effective methods to bring about the change you
     desire in the world is to live and lead by example.  Mocking 
     differences, what you do not understand, or things where you 
     have not done due diligence with your research will rarely, if
     ever, encourage people to change their views.


8.  Inspiring people by what you do, what you say, and how you
     present yourself has the power to motivate them.  You can't
     motivate other people, you can only motivate yourself! But you
     can be the source of inspiration that could push someone toward
     making the changes necessary to move forward and improve.
     (Apologies to Mikki Williams, a fabulous inspirational speaker!)


9.  Sometimes it takes a long, long, long time to reach your goals. 
     Be ready to sink into the mud and wade through it. It's not 
     always easy to take that difficult path, but it's going to be worth
     the adventure!  


10. List making is a great way to organize your thoughts and make
      sure your goals are prioritized. I have always loved making lists
      as one of my coping strategies.  Being a mom means those lists
      have become even more important!  And remember to put your
      own needs on that "to do" list! It's okay to take care of yourself!
    

            
Another one of my Independents
Copyright 2017 World of Writer Mom

Wishing everyone a wonderful week filled 
with challenges, adventures, &
plenty of resources to tackle your goals!

Kindest Regards,
~ Mary

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Parenting Beyond the Pit of Despair ~ Tip #1 in a series


SPECIAL NOTE: This post was originally published under Reflections Beneath the Poetz Tree (My very first blog creation.) It was titled: Picture This! Parenting Trick #1 and published on 10/14/2014.  I decided to resurrect it because I can still relate to it even after three years and 3months.  These same personalities remain strong and continue to challenge the heck out of me.









  Three of My Characters
Copyright 2018 World of Writer Mom


In a World of Writer Mom Moment not so long ago...

Copyright 2018 World of Writer Mom


I have three children ages 12, 9, and 7 years.  (Note: Today they are 15, 12, and 10 years old.) They each have very strong personalities that have a tendency to collide with intensity and frequency.   When that happens, stars explode and planets move out of their way.  And although meteorologists would deny that my children's behavior has a direct and supernatural  impact upon the weather...I am often convinced that the seasonal storms that roll in can be directly attributed to my children's tempestuous relationship with each other.  At least it feels that way to me.

I know that parenting children who are given the opportunity to express their own opinions and "share" their emotions presents unique challenges.  It is also important for them to have a place to learn skills that will serve them well throughout life.  I want them to have experiences that allow them to practice self-regulation, appropriate social interactions, and acceptable behaviors when released to the community.  The consequence of providing this "practice" is that you will often want to bang your fists against a pillow and shake your head until your brain turns to scrambled eggs. 

(Note: This was going on back then...)

The media has recently given much attention to the NFL player who whipped his child with a switch to "discipline" him.  The short term effect of instilling fear and pain is real and tangible to the child.  But in the long run, what will that child really learn about that interaction?  Planning for how to interact with a child and preparing to teach a  child about consequences is an emotionally draining task that requires on going maintenance.  Be forewarned:  You will repeat yourself a bazillion times and often feel like your words are absorbed into the ozone where they dissipate and  becomes inactive.  It is important to have the mind set that parenting involves a lot of repetition, frequent revisions, and a lot of input from a supporting cast. 

Fighting and arguing are prime examples of issues that occur among siblings.  "Stop looking at me like that" and "Stop touching me" are common phrases that fly around during waking hours.  When you have children who each wish they were an only child, it can be difficult if not impossible to convince all parties that you are being fair to everyone.  Someone is always going to feel maligned. Inevitably someone will to attempt to use that magical power of childhood known as "manipulation."  Smart little buggers.  They know exactly which buttons to push to make mommy feel guilty.  And because mommy was raised to feel guilty based on her parents' techniques...well you can imagine what a perfect storm that could potentially create.  Like I said...these are smart children.



One of the Independents
Copyright 2018 World of Writer Mom


So I came up with a few tricks of my own that have started to alleviate some of the stress that comes with parenting children who are actually given the opportunity to express their emotions without fear of "the switch" or other form of "that's the way I was raised" parenting that has been discussed in the media.  Last night was a perfect example of how reminiscing can be a great way to realign siblings with each other and help them see the strong bonds that exist...even though they might argue at times.


Parenting Tip #1
Goal:  Remind siblings of their strong bond with each other
Dream Result: 24 hours of peaceful co-existence
Reminder Cue:  "I loved seeing those pictures of us having fun together." 

Last night my brother came over so we could record Happy 100th Birthday" messages for our Grandmother.  (Can you believe 100 years old?!)  He also had photos and videos on his computer from several years ago when the children were much younger.  We looked at those pictures and videos together and rediscovered some of the fun we had together.  There were snow day pictures where everyone was bundled up to keep warm.  We had bubble day where my daughter screamed with joy at the large bubbles we blew outside.  There was a picture of the youngest son learning to walk.



Create beautiful gift books and birthday tributes 
for special occasions!
Like 100th Birthday Celebrations!

Weddings
Anniversaries
Pregnancy and Births


This offer ends 01/24/2018!

 Update as of 01/16/2018
By the way, Grandma just turned 103! 
This year she is going for 104!  Incredible, right?


We pointed out that even as a baby, the youngest one wanted to follow his older brother around.  Pointing out those connections and having visual proof that we had many happy times together was just the remedy we needed.  Sometimes we forget those opportunities to connect when we are so busy dealing with the day to day details.  



Copyright 2018 World of Writer Mom
Memories from a moment without fighting. A treasure indeed!


So if you have strong willed children who like to argue with each other, take heart.  You are not alone.  It is not an easy task to parent these children.  I can assure you, I would much rather have children who can speak their mind, have opinions, and are encouraged to express their true feelings than to be a parent who makes all my children's decisions for them.  The world can be harsh.  Children need to be able to speak up for themselves, stand up for their beliefs, and make decisions that are wise and in their best interest.  That doesn't just happen automatically.  We have to nurture those self-advocacy skills from the time they are young. 
So get out those family photos and videos and pop some popcorn the next time you need a break from the discord.  It's magical.  I look forward to hearing from you and would love to post your "Parenting Tricks."  have a wonderful day and a Blessed Week!


Making memories and documenting dreams can become a part of your family tradition! Here's one simple way to gather around the computer or kitchen table and create the evidence you will crave once everyone has grown up.  Trust me, these moments will fly by. 

Sunday, January 14, 2018

Bathroom Etiquette ~ May the Flush Be Ever In Your Favor

Here's something you can ponder instead of worrying about who is using the public restrooms.  Do your business, mind your business, and don't worry about someone else's business in the restrooms. 

OMG I just read another post about the transgender bathroom dilemma. Guess where I saw that comment? My goal this year as a writer and advocate is to become the nicest TROLL ever. 


T - Teach
       R - Respect
         O - Observe
        L - Listen
          L - Learn


In this particular case, people were off on a tangent thanks to one person's comment. Time for a little humor, so here's what I posted in the most respectful, funny way in an effort to divert the feed. 


Here's my comment:


 
" Dear Lord, it's the bathroom dilemma again? The truth is, if the ladies room is full and there's an empty stall in the men's room when I have a bathroom "emergency" then guess what? I don't care where it is...that stall is for me versus having another type of disaster. (Some of you probably know what I'm talking about.)


When you have a situation where your digestive system is not cooperating, you'll decide pretty quick the significance of where you need to go. Aside from that, many of you have most likely been in a rest room with someone who is transgender and you'd never even know it. Many places of business now have "family" rest rooms too. We can discuss worse case scenarios all day and never reach an agreement on this one.


Travel to other areas of the world or find yourself in a situation where you need to relieve yourself by the side of a road because there's no bathroom at all. Perspective, self awareness, a good dose of mind your own business, and get out of the restroom quickly can go a long way. And for goodness sakes....I expect better than name calling here. If you wanna hear some really disturbing bathroom tales, me and my horrible digestive system can entertain for hours."



Sigh. There will never be total agreement on this. But let's be honest. We just need a place to go when it's time to go.



Additional Comments added Saturday, 01/14/2017


UPDATE: Ironic that this would happen shortly after I posted my article, but here is what actually happened yesterday while I was shopping with my 3 children in WalMart. I went to the customer service area at the back of the store to use the restroom. A WalMart employee was standing guard near the women's restroom and two other women were standing in line as if waiting. They looked at me and said "The restroom is closed." I asked, "What about the one at the front of the store?" I was informed, "That one is closed too and we were told to come back here." So basically, there were NO women's restrooms available. I looked at the WalMart employee and said, "Are both the restrooms back here closed?" She replied, "No. Just this one (referring to the women's)."


Without hesitation, and with the utmost of confidence in my mission, I declared, "I don't care which bathroom this is; I have to pee." I proceeded to enter the men's restroom and secured a stall where I quickly did my business, got out and washed my hands, and exited just as another person was entering the restroom. The individual didn't even blink, question me, or stop on their way to a stall. End of story. I had to go, there was only one option, and I did what needed to be done without disturbing anyone else. Of course, the women who were waiting before I went in were not around when I came out. Perhaps they found another option. Each of us will have to comes to terms with our comfort level regarding this topic. 



The main point is:  You need to exercise the same level of awareness and caution as pre-transgender bathroom rights.  There will always be extreme examples and concerns to cite as credible concerns for some individuals.  The reality is that we all need to look out for each other, be vigilant of variances in safety, consider our surroundings, and exercise good judgment when your gut tells your something isn't comfortable. 


Regardless of how someone identifies, each person deserves respect and a sense of security within their community.  If you have time to be worried about verifying the accuracy of who uses public bathrooms, it may be time to reconsider using restrooms outside of your home and invest in your own port-a-potty.  Just out of curiosity...who really looks that closely at each person during their time in the bathroom?  Surely I'm not the only one who just wants to go in, do my business, and exit after washing my hands.  


So there you have it.  Just another perspective on the bathroom agenda.  Hoping you all make good choices in what you choose to support.  Encouraging you to be respectful, aware of your surroundings in each circumstance, and use discernment before passing judgment on what you do not understand. And wherever or whenever you decide it necessary to relieve yourself, may the flush be ever in your favor.


 Kindest Wishes,
Mary
 

https://www.facebook.com/writermomadvocate/

copyright 2018 World of Writer Mom



Monday, January 8, 2018

A View from the Lighthouse 2018

THIS POST IS A REPRINT FROM EARLIER THIS YEAR
and CONTAINS AFFILIATE LINKS for POSH MOMMY
Free Graphic attributed to https://cdn.pixabay.com/photo/2017/06/04/22/55/lighthouse-2372424_960_720.jpg


CONGRATULATIONS CLASS of 2018!

 Graduation Gifts


Today I read another interesting post from The Activist Mommy. My goal this year is to continue to respectfully call out readers (and writers) regarding their generalizations, assumptions, stereotypes, labels, and visual challenges. There are times I think I might unfollow  The Activist Mommy due to the tremendous outpouring of vitriol from some of her followers. Instead, I decided to write.


I encourage you to visit and read (and heck...follow if you want) The Activist Mommy.  Awareness of differing viewpoints and perspectives is critical. Provide yourselves with the insights necessary to decide how you want to make a difference and effect positive change in our world and in our own communities.  


 
World of Writer Mom's View


Hand written messages from Mom and Dad


When you light your page on fire using your talents as a writer and activist, watch your forest burn, and choose to let readers add fuel to that raging fire, it is also important to provide ways to remedy the burn scar. If there are no resources provided for rehabilitation after a fire, nothing can grow, live, and thrive under those adverse conditions.  You might have the guide book, but without accurate translations, insights, and resources from accompanying experts in the field, assembling a cohesive team that is truly reflective of that guide book is risky.  There may be a high chance of inaccuracies and misplaced understanding of complex concepts.

PERFECT GIFTS FOR FATHER'S DAY 2018

Silver Daddy Dog Tag & Family Crest Necklace Men's Personalized Jewelry

After reading some comments against Oprah Winfrey regarding her speech at the Golden Globes award ceremony on Sunday evening 01/02/2017, I found another perspective of Oprah Winfrey regarding human need for validation from another writer at  http://healthyspirituality.org/exploring-the-human-need-to-seek-validation/  Perspective and research.  They have valid placement in our collective efforts.   



Here is the entire speech Oprah presented last night


Here is another article I found after researching a related topic. I like this article because it provides specific strategies on creating goals according to the topic presented. These are the type of insights that can become valuable to readers. 


Please share this and consider following my journey this year. 



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I will continue to read opinions that differ from mine, because I believe it is important to understand where things stand from a variety of perspectives. It is only in understanding our current situation that we can begin to move forward and consider how to set goals to create awareness...on all levels. This is not a situation of one side is the only right side. (Though I hear you that some individuals believe there is one and only right side.) Please consider there are infinite variables to be taken into consideration.



It's human nature to pick sides. It's human nature to want our opinions validated. It's human nature to become protective of our personal causes and those who are in harm's way. It's human nature to want to demonstrate our righteousness and defend our belief systems. There are 7,593,701,707 people in the world at the moment I looked up this number. It is ever changing. http://www.worldometers.info/world-population/ Look at this site and think about how incredibly complex it must be to even think that these changes can keep up with all the opinions, beliefs, life experiences, points of view, daily challenges, political situations, etc....that occur.


Gifts for the Holidays

To expect that everyone is going to be on the same page at the same time for the same amount of time is futile.

Change is a process; it's not a snap your fingers, click your heels together three times, do a little dance, make a little love statement, and sing we are the world as sprinkles of fairy dust descend upon everything. Change is so much more complex and dynamic. You can choose to draw your line in the sand and stay on your end of the beach, or you can be part of a plan to understand the waves of the ocean, the erosion process in that line of sand, and the solutions that need to occur when challenges wash up on shore.


How do you want to make a difference from your starting point? 
My response to The Activist Mommy's post:
   
So what is your plan to create the kind of world you envision? I am interested in hearing your goals, strategies, and measurable outcomes. It's fine to have an opinion about someone's view points and methods. It's great to encourage change and promote healthier attitudes, perspectives, and wellness. It is also important to define your plan so there is a clear understanding of direction. If you're not prepared to offer an alternative, then perhaps it's time to figure out the piece to this puzzle. It's easy for readers here to offer judgments, labels, assumptions, and generalizations. The hard part is figuring out your personal role, specific activities for participation, and a commitment to follow through on these plans of action. I'm waiting and listening to the responses here. This is the information I'm interested in from The Activist Mommy in 2018.

Gifts for MOM at POSH Mommy


Planning to engage in commentary with The Activist Mommy?
Here are a few resources for your consideration.






 

Inviting you to also follow me on Twitter at 
https://twitter.com/PTZTree

  #WorldofWriterMom #WriterMomAdvocate #TheActivistMommy #GoldenGlobeAwards #OprahWinfrey #ViewfromtheLighthouse


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HAPPY MONDAY!

Wishing all of you a week of adventures,
solutions to your challenges, and
 answers to your prayers.



Copyright 2018 World of Writer Mom
Kindest Wishes,
Mary



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Real Life Awareness:

Recommendations do not imply liability, responsibility for disappointments or failed expectations, or regret over budgeting woes. I trust each reader to use their own good judgment when it comes to knowing what will work best for you and your family. (Because...well...I am not the ultimate decision maker, judge, or source of approval for anyone except myself...and my children...until they are legally allowed to represent themselves.)

Thank You for taking time to read, participate, and share your adventures with me. Hopefully, we'll find something to occasionally purchase, enjoy, and use in an effort to create a special moment.

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SUN Inspired STYLES for SUMMER 2018

COMFORTABLE URBAN CLOTHING MEN FIND DESIRABLE

BODY CARE by NATIVE

~ LANMODO ~ PROTECT YOUR VEHICLE

Google+ Followers (Awesome Inspirations)

About Me

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I have over 20 years of experience in Early Childhood Development Birth-Age 5 including work in classrooms and as an Infant/Toddler Program Manager.  I have several writing projects in progress including a resource book for parents of infants and infant room teachers in a full day child development (school) program.  The book will provide families with information about what to expect and how to monitor their child's progress in an Infant room.  My second book project involves how to cope with family challenges, lessons in forgiveness, dealing with a spouse's addiction, and reinventing yourself along the way.  I am excited about all of these projects and am currently accepting comments regarding experiences my readers have had placing their child into a full day child care program.  I would also like to hear from Infant room teachers.