Monday, January 28, 2019

Moments for A Monday ~ 2019 (Post #3)

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Written by: Anashea Remington

Have you ever woken up on a Monday and felt like things were a little off? Perhaps someone said something to you or an event happened that left you with a sick feeling in your belly. Maybe you were cut off in traffic one too many times, and you began to wonder if it just wasn't your day to be on the road with humans.  Whatever is was, how did you handle the situation?  Did you allow those effed up feelings to ruin your day, or did you transform those emotions into something more manageable?

That's where I am today, dear readers.  I was doing fine when I woke up. The snow had started to fall and covered the car, but it was the powdery snow.  It wasn't the "stick to your windshield" icy kind that needed to be chiseled off while the defroster was set to "high" in the car.  All the kids got to school on time, and I even made breakfast for myself.  Eggs, sausage, toast, and fruit fueled my energy for the day. I planned to get appointments set, words written, and a few project started around the house.  Then the phone call came.

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It would be different if I hadn't been so understanding of the many eff ups that my husband has pulled over the past 20 years.  It would be different if he had been there for me during the challenging moments in our relationship.  I don't even care at this point that I'm writing all this down, because he truly doesn't give a crap about my writing goals and never reads my stuff anyways. (Neither does my family, so I'm sure this will go unnoticed too.) So I'm going to go ahead and let it rip because quite honestly, I'm effin' tired of the emotional turmoil that this individual has put me through over the years.  So for him to call and complain about the finances when he's not even here to understand that children grow and need clothes and shoes, food is expensive and I don't have a walk-in freezer/refrigerator like he does at work (he's a chef) for a SYSCO order every week, (thus the higher cost of food since I don't buy in bulk), and I cannot work outside the home because all three of our children have chronic medical situations that keep me on a rotating schedule with their doctor.  On top of that, I am still recovering from a car accident.  

So this is one of those moments that inspires change. 
I am tired of being told I don't do enough.  
Here are Ten Things that I do to keep our little family together.

1.Pay the bills. I manage this extremely well on one salary.
2.Our only outstanding debt is the car payment and child's tuition.
3.We have NO credit card debt.
4.We have paid CASH for all family emergencies.
5.We have paid CASH for holidays and special occasions like birthdays.
6.We do not live beyond our means. 
7.We shop at thrift stores for most of our clothing.
8.We know how to put together meals from whatever is in the pantry. 
9.We do not buy what we do not need.
10.I make sure our children can participate in school activities even when our budget is tight.

Would I like to return to work where I get a paycheck? YES
Would it affect our current routine where I can drop off/pick up the kids? YES 
Do we really need that extra pay check? Sure. It would be nice.
Is it worth sacrificing my health and well being or that of our children at the moment? NO.


So what can I do to deflect the anxiety that occurs when I receive one of these phone calls?

1.Tell myself I am not the one with the issue. I am doing my best.
2.Find ways to deflect the stress that is thrown my way.
3.Acknowledge that this situation is temporary, and that one day I will be able to put aside more for savings.
4.Continue to do my best to manage our finances even when it feels tight.  
5.Resist the pressure to buy on credit. It will only make the problem worse.
6.Continue to work on my personal goals to publish, create a side income for my family, and look for other work from home opportunities.
7.Reassure husband that we are doing well, considering many families are in over their head with debt.
8.Pray and hope the choir of angels rains a shower of pennies upon me.
9.Remember that I had a full career and an excellent resume of skills prior to starting my family, and I have continued to gain new skills since then.
10.My story here is not over yet. I still have a lot left to accomplish. So even if my family does not see that at the moment, I need to remind myself that my time will come.  The ingredients are still simmering.  ~ Anashea Remington

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Wishing all of you a week of adventures,
solutions to your challenges,
answers to your prayers,
& resources to help you survive
all of your collaborative projects!

Kindest Wishes,

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