World of Writer Mom

Sunday, June 16, 2024

Summertime Reminder: More Mess = More Fun (Mostly)

This article first appeared on the following site on July 5, 2016

Reprinted here with revisions.

Monkey Bars, Mud Pies, and Movement
by: M.B.Varville-Rodriguez

PLAY UNTIL YOUR CLOTHES ARE DIRTY!
by:M.B.Varville-Rodriguez

💜

It's O.K. to let the kiddos enjoy a water play fountain or mud puddle once in a while. One of the best memories I have from childhood is when my younger brother and I played in a huge mud puddle outside our home. We were covered in mud and totally soaked in dirty water. My parents, unbeknownst to us, were filming our antics. They have the evidence that I encouraged my brother to dip his hair into the filthy muck and we both laughed as the muddy water trickled down his face when he lifted his head. We had a blast and I'm still amazed that my parents actually let us do that. My mother said that she never could get all that mud out of our clothing no matter how many times she washed them. But that memory is priceless. Documenting memories is an investment in your family's history!

Don't worry, my brother got me back many times over. He could tell me a story with a straight face, and I always believed him. I kinda still do. His jokes are legendary, and I love it when he sends me my favorite "Far Side" cartoons. But the amount of fun we had as kids often involved getting as much mud, dirt, and water on ourselves as possible before the streetlights came on at night.

Let's paint, create with play dough, cook in the kitchen,

and make blanket tents!

Kids need lots of opportunities to explore, play, and get messy. I remember a day when I took my three children to a park right after it rained. I had not anticipated the play area would be so flooded. The kids were restless and didn't care that the ground beneath the swing set was muddy. They had been in the house all day and needed to play. I hadn't planned for it but went ahead and let them get messy. They laughed, had fun, and even made-up stories to go along with their muddy adventure. I couldn't help but laugh with them as I recalled my own muddy memories. We finally decided to go home when it became too chilly, and the wind picked up. I didn't even mind the clean-up of both car and kids following our visit to the park.

Here are a few things to remember if it's hard for you

to get on board with the tremendous messes
that come with childhood:

Summertime Reminders

1. Kids are washable. A bit of bath water and some soap and most of them clean up well.

2. Messy memories are some of the best ones. We also loved lots of finger painting that

often reached beyond their fingertips, play dough, cookie creations with lots of flour

everywhere, and bubbles. All of these required clean up.

3. Dirt, sand, and grass stains were the result of many creative play adventures. Kids learn

through play. Let them have opportunities to explore and get messy! Then take them to

the laundry mat for a whole new adventure! (Lol)

4. Don't worry too much about the clothes. They outgrow them pretty fast anyways. Also,

shop at thrift stores like Good Will and The ARC to save on clothing costs. Then you

won't feel as bad when the clothes get messed up. Save other clothes for special

occasions if you'd like but be prepared to take pictures right after putting them on the

kiddos. Chances are, that adorable outfit won't stay clean very long.

5. Kids LOVE projects! When my siblings and I were growing up, my mother signed up to

receive craft kits once a month. This kept us occupied and allowed our family to create

some incredibly fun things: Candle making, Macrame plant hangers, Decoupage

decorations for the wall, Cross stitch Christmas ornaments, and so many more!

Inside Secrets of a Former Child Development Teacher

TIP: If your child attends a full day childcare program/school, please expect that at some point those clothes will become dirty. Please do NOT send them in their best outfits and expect them to look the same way at the end of the day. They need to have fun, and the teachers need to worry about other things besides keeping clothes clean.

I have to remind myself on a daily basis that messes comes with childhood. Now that my three children are much older, I do have expectations that they pick up their room and try to keep the house clean. (And that battle is for another blog.)

As I write this, their rooms reflect a disaster of epic proportions, and I am trying to breathe through the trauma that occurs when I walk past their door....one I try to keep closed. But for now, I'll smile at the messy memories as we work toward that next stage in their development.

Happy Monday everyone!

Wishing everyone a wonderful week filled

with challenges, adventures, &

plenty of resources to tackle your goals!

Speaking engagements & Advocacy Coaching

Contact me at mbvrodriguez3@yahoo.com for information to schedule

a presentation, inspirational speech, or coaching session

to advocate for your personal cause or concern.

I can also assist with written communication needs.

Rates are negotiable.

Thursday, May 23, 2024

Anatomy of A Conversation - Life's Lessons

Originally published at Reflections Beneath the Poetz Tree
on Friday, November 22,2013
by: M.B.Varville-Rodriguez

Note: This post was a reminder to me that time is dynamic and waits for nobody. I now have two children who have graduated from high school and one more to go next year. These teachable moments can be easily missed if one is not fully present, distracted, and on the phone. Please take time to consider the impact and benefits of observing, shutting down social media, and engaging in conversations when these opportunities present themselves. Time moves quickly. don't miss out on these moments.

I am always intrigued by how a seemingly simple conversation with my children can evolve into a more serious subject matter. Wednesday morning, I dropped Sebastien off at school first since his brother Nathan had a doctor's appointment. I then returned home for transportation round#2 with Isabella needing a ride to Middle School then Nathan and I going to the doctor's appointment from there. On the short ride to drop off Isabella, I asked Nathan to please remind me to pick up a bottle of water for Sebastien so I could deliver it to him when Nathan was done with his appointment. Sebastien's Spider Man water bottle had sprung a leak when I attempted to fill it that morning. It was a Dollar Store purchase, so I didn't expect it to last the entire school year.

Sebastien likes to chew on the top to his water bottle, so it was likely the cause of its early demise. Nathan made a negative comment about this, so I felt compelled to launch into my developmental explanation about why some children have a need to chew on things: water bottle tops, erasers, etc...I informed Nathan that some children, like Sebastien, actually need to chew to help them focus while in school. Sebastien has a lot of motor energy that is probably hard for him to contain while in school. Yet he does it extremely well. Chewing may be a compensatory technique for him. I'm not sure if it totally convinced Nathan, but it did allow me to further explain another topic near to my heart.

We discussed how everyone has different learning styles. Some people are kinesthetic learners and need to be able to touch items to learn about things. Writing, hands-on science experiments, and learning about letters through texture props can facilitate learning. Also, some individuals need to be in motion to pay attention and learn. Last year Sebastien's Kindergarten teachers were excellent about allowing the class to participate in music and movement prior to beginning their rotation of centers. They learned their sight words through action games such as a "snowball" throw. The sight words were written on sheets of white paper, wadded into balls, and placed into a large bucket. When the teacher began the music, a snowball throw began. When the music ended, each child had to grab one snowball and bring it to the teacher. The child then opened the ball and revealed a sight word, which he/she recited for the teacher. Brilliant and fun! I had the opportunity to observe this for the Christmas party last year and was impressed by the results.

Some individuals are visually tuned in and do well with written information, posters on display in the room, and other props. I explained to Isabella that when I help her with homework, I always ask to see the math problem or the information she is trying to study because I need to have that visual cue. If she just recites the math problem, it is harder for me to focus on a way to help her. I also need pencil and paper to show her how I envision the problem being solved. (kinesthetic)

Music is a terrific auditory cue that helps with memorization of information. Listening to the teacher, hearing a video tutorial, and being able to study while listening to music, a movie, or other external sounds are also indications that someone is an auditory learner.

We talked about how sometimes children can be on "sensory overload" and have a difficult time focusing in a classroom. This overload can happen if the lights are too bright, there are unusual aromas in the room, if others are talking too much, or if the classroom has so many decorations and information displayed in the room that they become distracted. (I have seen a lot of overloaded classrooms - sometimes out of necessity when teachers have no storage space.)

I explained to Isabella and Nathan that sometimes a child will be allowed to chew gum in the classroom if it helps him/her focus on the assignments. Other children may be prescribed treatment by an Occupational Therapist that encourages them to sit on a therapy ball instead of in a regular desk chair because it helps the student maintain focus. There are many reasons why students could benefit from adaptations to their environment and to their workstations.

When I mentioned the therapy ball, Isabella shared that there is a student in one of her classes who uses a therapy ball and sees a therapist. The child is having a hard time attending to her work and gets distracted. The student lost a parent in a car accident just over the summer and needs extra assistance adjusting to Middle School due to the trauma experienced so recently.

Of course, I started to get teary-eyed. I stopped in front of the school to let Isabella out and gave her a big hug. I told her how much I love her. You never know when a car ride to school will lead to a conversation that stops you in your tracks. Forget about the list of things that you planned to do! That day, I took Nathan to his doctor's appointment, picked up another water bottle for Sebie, took Nathan back to school, and personally took the water bottle and a snack to Sebastien's first grade classroom. Those simple actions took on new meaning for me as I thought about the now mother-less middle school child whose life had changed forever over the summer. And I felt a deeper appreciation for the opportunities I still have to talk to my children about the things that matter to me and to them.

Anatomy of A Conversation indeed! Allow your children to talk, but also take those teachable moments and see where a conversation might lead. From a chewed-up water bottle to learning styles to the loss of a parent...all these conversations are helping my children gain information that will shape who they are, how they learn to cope in the world, and hopefully inspire them to respond with compassion to those in need when the time comes.

Thanks again for taking time to read this and I welcome your input regarding the subjects I write about. Sharing resources and encouraging each other as we go through our journey as parents is a worthwhile endeavor. It is a pleasure to have you along for the ride.

Speaking engagements & Advocacy Coaching

Contact me at mbvrodriguez3@yahoo.com for information to schedule

a presentation, inspirational speech, or coaching session

to advocate for your personal cause or concern.

I can also assist with written communication needs.

Rates are negotiable.

Monday, April 29, 2024

Your Children Need to MOVE!

C. Reflections Beneath the Poetz Tree

Just Move

Originally published on Saturday, October 08, 2016, at

Monkey Bars, Mud Pies, & Movement

by: M.B.Varville-Rodriguez

Present Day Note: This was a great reminder to me of times when my children were in Elementary School, and I did drop off and pick up. My youngest is now a Junior in High School, and I noticed similar needs for movement from the Junior High (close to the high school) and High School students as they leave the building - especially now that the weather is warming up. Being tethered to a desk in a room with your peers is not natural - our bodies are meant to move throughout our day (or our shift now that we are adults). Here are my thoughts following one of those pick-up days almost eight years ago.

I just had to write again about how much children need opportunities to move throughout the day. They crave movement. Even when children have challenges that might inhibit them from moving on their own, they still need someone to help them move to activate their muscles.

Waiting for my children to come to the car rider line at the end of their school day is one of my favorite things to do. Sometimes parents are busy doing other things as they wait. But I encourage parents to look up as soon as that bell rings and really watch how the children come out. The observations are stunning. The manner in which those kiddos exit the building will give you some insights into why movement and the lack of movement during a school day are so significant.

Let me share what I observed one warm, sunny day after the bell:

1. Doors bursting wide open as children run free.

2. A few children sprint directly toward the playground where they jump up the stairs ricochet down the

slides and attempt to climb to the roof over one of the platforms.

3. There are cartwheels, tumbles, and playful wrestling matches on the way to their cars.

4. Laughter, joking with friends, and smiles echo through the air.

5. Motion toward the cars are accomplished via skips, hops, and even a few twirls.

6. A few children simply spin towards their direction of travel.

7. Some children are so happy to be outside, they fall to the ground and look up to the sky.

8. In the distance, I see some friends rolling down a hill, backpacks tossed aside.

9. Several children happily walk hand in hand with parents who escort them back to their parked

vehicles or to nearby homes.

10. Calmly waiting for your parents...not an option. Movement of some type is always noted, even if it's

swinging arms, stomping feet into the dirt, or doing a few squats in place.

Important Reminder

If your child has not had enough opportunities to expend this energy after school, you can definitely expect it to come out inside the house. So be prepared to offer indoor options if outdoor play is not on the schedule after school. Those jumps, spins, and climbs? Yeah, that's gonna happen. Ideas for inside activities:

1. An obstacle course using pillows, soft balls, laundry baskets for practicing dunk shots

and even a sock toss station could help create fun yet safe movement opportunities.

Remove the chairs from the dining room or kitchen and let the kiddos crawl under. Set up

an area to "skip" over stuff. (Use place mats, books, or stuffed animals to jump over.)

2. A small trampoline can be magic for the child who simply needs to bounce. I have one of

those. (The bounce seeking child.) I also got the exercise trampoline that is designed for

indoor use. (Hint: Get the ones that are already put together. Those that need to be

assembled will make you swear like crazy. No lie!)

3. If you're not worried about the furniture (we are a family that highly recommends thrift

stores like Good Will or The Arc) you might consider allowing your tumblers to flip over

the soft couch. I know, I know, it goes against how you were raised to not jump on

furniture. However, some children are sensory seeking and need to tumble, flip, and

challenge their balance. Be specific about what you will allow them to try if possible.

(Lord knows they can come up with some stunts you'd never imagined.)

4. Turn off the television and turn on some music. See who can come up with the silliest or

coolest dance moves. Let them go up and down the stairs in time to the music. Encourage

them to move in a variety of directions/movement patterns. For example:

Up/Down arm movements and squats
Reaching over to the left then to the right then up then down
Forward/Backward steps
Turn steps to left then right
Shaking your arms and legs
Tapping your toes/Clapping your hands
Jump/Clap/Twist combinations

The idea is to keep them moving until they reach a point where you see they are ready for a cool down/calming activity. You'll know when your child reaches that moment.

Plan a quiet activity as a transition. Perhaps dim the lights and ask them to listen really close for their heartbeat. Tell them to talk a deep breath in and make a whoosh sound as they breath out. You can even practice counting for the inhale and the exhale. Then ask them to listen again for their heartbeat. When you finish with this activity (2 minutes is good) offer a glass of water and a light snack to hold them over until dinner.

Hopefully this transition from school to home can become a part of their routine and allow for a calmer start to their evening. How do you help your children decompress after their school day?

Speaking engagements & Advocacy Coaching

Contact me at mbvrodriguez3@yahoo.com for information to schedule

a presentation, inspirational speech, or coaching session

to advocate for your personal cause or concern.

I can also assist with written communication needs.

Rates are negotiable.